Challenge By Choice (:

Current Location: Home, room.
Current Music: Varsity Fanclub - Future Love.

I foresee ... that this coming week of mine is going to be so busy. ): Actually not foresee, 'cause I know. It's all laid out. Ugh. I am going to be so busy! Rushing here and there. But don't get me wrong, I like it. Keeping me busy, I mean.

Really don't feel like going for school on Tuesday. It's Sports Business. Accounting and calculations and blah blah blah. I don't likeee. I don't like doing something I'm not confident in. I can't even act like I'm confident when I'm presenting, 'cause I'm just not. I just practically calculate out whatever calculations my teammates asked me to, and present. Totally so -.-

(Goodness, I just got a prank call from Hakim. Lol! That was so funny! Haha!)

Sigh, I'm so loving the weekends. Away from school, away from pre-readings, away from FYP. =\ and after tomorrow, the whole cycle starts again. Gahhhh.

♥♥♥

I came up with a theory when I was having a chat with Mr. Marvin the other day. -

Sometimes you have to step out of your own shadow in order to accept a new relationship. You can't possibly keep yourself in all the time.

But opening your heart up to someone would means getting hurt. It's not worth it.

Then, I realize something I've learnt in OAL (outdoor adventure learning) can be applied here. We've learnt something about the "Comfort Zone", "Challenge Zone", and the "Panic Zone". The "Challenge Zone" is in the optimal range. Like kind of the best? Yep. And the "Panic Zone" is the worst, 'cause you're traumatized.

Yep, I guess I'm in the "Comfort Zone" now. (: And I don't want to step out of it. Not yet.

Updates **

Current Location: Home, room.
Current Music: Linkin Park - New Divide.

I've completed the second week of school! I've finished my first logbook ever! And although I still had 4 more annotations left, I'm done with one!

Haha. I was oh-so tired yesterday. Forced myself to finish up part of my FYP stuffs. And sheesh, it was totally worth it. (: 'Cause the feeling is great.

Class was quite fun this week. Outdoor Leadership (OL) is out of RP, at Dairy Farm! Haha, it was quite productive, I would say. Without all the laptops as distraction, I would say. And I got another 'A'! ^^

Challenge Course Management (CCM) was out of class to, at ALC. And guess what? It rained. And~ We had games! LOL! It was kind of dumb, but it was really funny. So it goes like this. Whenever there's a lightning, we would have to squat down, cover our ears, and shout, "lightning!" Haha! Funny right!

Met up with BGF today! Haha, though it was only a short time, while we were eating, I was so pleased that I finally managed to meet her today! Haha, it's like we can only see each other once a week. Kind of sad thinking upon that point. =\

And and and! BGF bought me this "anti-glare" screen-protector for iPhone! Haha! 'Cause she knew that I had been wanting to buy, but lazy to go meet the person. Omgzzz. I was so suprised! I love you loads loads, BGF! ^^

Kkays, Daddy's leaving for Germany, again tonight. And I'm going to see him off to the airport. And he wants me to drive there! Omgzzz! The fear factor is still there, but heck. Just do it, right? Haha.

And I'm going to miss an episode of Olympic! Ahh! Sigh, Apple really sold Olympic to the Zhengs Family. Thought she is, too a part of the family. But still! Sigh aye aye. If I were her, I definitely won't have the heart to sell my son. ): Plus he's so cuteee! Haha!

There was once, one of the facis asked what will get us excited. I had an answer in mind immediately, but I didn't say. 'Cause I was afraid people will laugh at me.

But I really want to say.

Pst! Babies get me excited. ^^

(:

So, maybe it's true that I can't live without you,

Boys Like Girls - Two Is Better Than One

I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life
And I thought hey
You know this cuold be something
'Cause everything you do and words you say
You know that it all takes my breath away
And now I'm left with nothing

So maybe it's true, that I can't live without you
Maybe two is better than one
But there's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two, is better than one

I remember every look upon your face,
The way you roll your eyes, the way you taste
You make it hard for breathing
'Cause when I close my eyes and drift away
I think of you and everything's okay
And finally now, believing

And maybe it's true, that I can't live without you
Well maybe two is better than one
But there's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two, is better than one

I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life
And I thought hey

Maybe it's true, that I can't live without you
Maybe two is better than one
But there's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking

Oooh I can't live without you
'Cause baby two is better than one
There's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life
And I've figuured out with all that's said and done
Two, is better than one

Two is better than one

.

Current Location: Home, room.
Current Music: DBSK - Mirotic.

I don't understand. I really don't. Why do the memories of the past keep haunting? Aren't they tired? I'm tired already, I'm really tired of it already. I had put it behind me, hadn't I? It doesn't really bother me anymore.

But whenever you ... Can't they just let me go? I don't know what's with me recently. I kept getting reminded of what happened in the past. Kept getting reminded of what you and you did.

And I think. Had I been someone who let things go too easily? I let it hurt me like nobody business. So that it won't hurt you. Now upon thinking back, I really think I'm so dumb. So damn dumb.

That matter ... It might not have bothered you. You could have just got on with your life. But me. I wished to go on too. I thought I had. Damn. Don't get it wrong, it's not any feelings still left inside. It's just the fear, the fear of liking someone new again.

Whenever I feel like liking someone, like really like that someone. I'll feel as if I got slapped from my memories. Loud slap, right here on my cheek. As if to wake me up, as if to warn me.

Two years already, it had been two years already my dear. I'm not saying here that I've taken a liking to anyone or I had any feelings left for that person.

But what I'm saying here is ... Is that. I don't know why this past can still hurt me after so long. Maybe not hurt, but serves as a warning. Yes, like a warning. For it doesn't hurt actually. It just hurts to think that I hadn't been fighting for myself. It just hurts to think that I had allowed myself to rip my heart further apart to keep their's together.

My heart hurts for the girl two years ago.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not holding any grudges or whatsoever for you and you. It's just ... I can never feel the same towards you guys again. You guys had moved on, you especially. And I ... I don't know what was that.

You moved on like that matter was nothing. Or was it really that case? It was really nothing for you. Oh well then if that's the case I think I was really blind back then. My eyes were blind, my ears tunned out everything that was against you and my heart? It had been beating for the wrong person, it had been ... It had been blind too.

Hahhh. This is one entry after so long that was really something. Sorry if it bothered anyone. But this is what I felt. And I'm not going to be that dumb girl who keeps everything inside her not wanting to hurt anybody. Or would she?

She wished to go up the ferris wheel @ 11.03.pm.

First day back to school,

Current Location: RP, E44P.
Current Music: Miranda Cosgrove - Raining Sunshine.

It's my first day back at school! Haha, after so long. IIP and holidays. Whoo.

Haha, and I'm still trying to adapt to the school life. 5 months away and ahh. Couldn't adapt to it at all! Haha, the journey to school is ... strange. Kind of in the weird track. Hah.

Kk, actually I'm done with all my work. But it's just that I can't find anything more to blog about. Haha.

So long, people. (:

She wished to go up the ferris wheel @ 2.08.pm